Saturday, April 2, 2011

Secrets secrets and more secrets

everyone has them right? i have them too! just many many many of it. i am attracted to physical appearances, i dont deny that. There's someone i'm attracted to now. ^^ Because i understood my own character of being fickle minded in small things but serious when it comes to things of huge significance. I cant commit myself to a relationship if i think its not a big deal. I've come to have short term relationships and i cant find what i was looking for. That's why i cant ever introduce my boyfriends to my friends because its one thing to be dating but another thing to fall in love. I cant do it, because i never honestly loved another before, sadly, aside from my family members. Recently my dad has been controlling my life more than ever even up to the time i sleep. I thought it would improve now that i'm legal but it got worse. I CAN NEVER consult these things with him. Besides these mudane issues i've been thinking what would happen if i didn't take the first step. i wonder do they really treat me as their friend? they dont tell me anything and dont even care abt what i think.its stupid yes but i'm lucky not all the people around me are like that (:
today i went to aj for the first time ever since i got my results. it was crowded but seriously hot. -.- i figured those ppl who got dunked actually wanted to get wet because of the heat. oho i think i went there to just waste money. which doesnt come by easily. AHEM to a certain rabbit that is chasing after carrots right now. xD i'm happy actually because aj was the place where most of my fondest memories remains though now they're just remnants of the past i truly thank all the people that have supported me through that hellish two years there. The pe dept, the tracks that used to be bumpy, the auditorium especially after morning pe, the nexus, 1135, 135 and all else i'll be with me till i die i think. Besides returning there i went novena to eat korean food again! sadly they didnt serve the korean pancake i craved for but i still got my fill of good food! the soup was spicy FOR THE FIRST TIME ^^ i loved it. if i had any other wish i'll be to dance officially as part of a dance crew.
On a side note i got a job finally! it wasnt easy to come by an office job. if all goes well i'll be starting work this coming thursday for training at tanjong pagar. Come find me if anyone have time! ^^ we can have lunch tgt! xD just kidding who would actually come. Sighs. i'm thinking if i should have gone to poly instead of jc then i wouldn't be moping around due to my results. what came as a real shock was my maths grade. i actually thought i would score better but what's in the past is in the past. i cant continue to cry over spilled milk. i'll just look to the future and score for my degree. If i do enter the uni. ENOUGH of these pestimistic talk i want to remain as the person i was these few years. If i do change into someone calm and cool yet pestimistic it wouldn't be me anymore. xD I WILL ENTER UNI AND I WILL STUDY THE NEXT ROUND. just you wait stupid life! i'm not satisfied with it but i'll do my best! GAMBATTE!
catching up on what i've done i actually did quite alot! i went to malaysia again and played like a silly duckling. it got me addicted jewbeat ^^ HAHA i do have such more catching up to do but i went to UNIVERSAL STUDIOS SINGAPORE. you wont believe how freaking ex the tickets normally are! A FREAKING 72 BUCKS per pax. but the place was super great!! just be prepared for sun bathing. HEH it was freaking hot over there and the food was really ex. the best thing there was the roller coaster 14 story high. i loves the shows there and the street jazz and dance that was there. i had to give the boat ride a miss because of the fear of getting wet. JEEZ and i wanted to ride it the most. pfffft, my sister was complaining half the time but other than that it was pretty fun.
I believe it wouldn't be the same if any of them were gone in a meeting, they're all my important friends. I love you guys and i wish you all the best! i look forward to meeting all of you! xD
i have to find a dance course soon. Any suggestions? i'll be posting videos in the future of me dancing freestyle~ AND I LOVE PEOPLE WHO SPEAK THEIR MIND xD
good bye bloggie!


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